As we wrap up the first month in the new year, I find myself drifting back into a creative space. The desire to write literally crept up on me this week as new topics, thoughts, & concepts invaded my mind. I’m ready to begin again. My spirit said it’s time. I needed to take some time away to heal emotionally, and to focus my energy on my latest endeavor. An endeavor that literally changed my life. I won’t go into details right now, but it’s been a rollercoaster like no other. I’ll share more later down the road, but I will say this experience has made me the strongest I’ve ever been mentally.
After the passing of my aunt, I spent a lot of time reflecting over my own life & what I’ve accomplished up until this point. I began thinking more about what I wanted my future to look like going forward. I’ve been in somewhat of a selfish phase for almost a year. I decided to be true to myself & stop forcing myself to pursue a love relationship when I really had no desire to be tied down. I was doing it because I felt I should…not because it was what I really wanted. But now I find my heart & mind opening to the thought of sharing space with someone. My heart is saying it’s time. I love traveling solo, but I find myself desiring a companion for my upcoming adventures. I’m not necessarily looking for a wife, but if she turns out to be marriage material then I’m open to allowing God to lead the way. When I encounter the woman He has for me, I hope & pray He slaps me in the back of the head saying, “That’s HER fool!” Because sometimes I feel like my “picker” is broken when it comes to choosing the right woman for me. I would love for God to take the guess work out of the process.
Although my heart is open…my patience for foolishness is short. I understand some women feel the need to play hard-to-get as a defense mechanism to ensure the man’s interest is genuine & that he has good intentions. But I no longer have the capacity for the games. If a woman plays hard-to-get with me…I’ll immediately assume she’s not interested & move on. Some women take their tests to unreasonable extremes. I’ve seen multiple women on social media talk about how they blocked a man they claimed to be interested in from having access to their profile…expecting him to find another way to contact them. If he doesn’t then in her mind he’s not really interested. In my mind, women who takes things to that level don’t want love. They want validation. Attention. To have their egos stroked. They still have some growing to do. I’ll admit I’ve played along with some of those games in the past, but I truly don’t have the capacity anymore. I know from my own experiences that when a woman is genuinely interested…she’ll make things easier for you. She’ll gladly put some skin in the game. Even the women in high demand. If she made a mistake in the past playing the hard-to-get game, she won’t allow her pride to ignore the fact that the “unblock” button works just as well as the “block” one…and rectify the situation. Fellas, you must pay attention to both what she’s saying & not saying, and exercise self-control at all times. Your life & livelihood hinge upon it. The misinterpretation of a woman’s interest can lead to a world of problems. There’s a fine line between shooting your shot in an attempt to let your interest be known…and harassment. And every woman has their own individual demarcation point between the two.
I’m fully accepting of the fact that I’m not going to be every woman’s type. By that same token, not every woman is going to be my type. Find the one who speaks lovingly to your spirit…as well as your eyes. If she’s not willing to meet you halfway she’s not the one. Protect your peace & be patient. The right one will appear in due season. Life is too short to waste time on what isn’t for you. This includes relationships, careers, & anything else that consumes your time & energy. As we continue to play out our role in the story 2024 presents to us, be cognizant of the characters in your life & the role they’re choosing to play (or not play) …and move accordingly. You have goals to pursue & dreams to fulfill. Time is of the essence.
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